I AM AT RISK OF STDs YET I'M NOT ALLOWED TO ADVOCATE SAFER SEX??? WOMEN, TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR SEXUAL AND REPRODUCTIVE HEALTH

ladies, is your man always insistent on not using a condom during sex even when he knows you're not safe?? then this is for you.
I've had conversations with women whose men would rather not have sex with them than use a condom knowing fully well the woman stands a chance of getting pregnant (when she is not ready for a baby) or when she has thrush or any other uncomfortable infection. (this might also sound strange to some women who have been in smooth and understanding relationships).
A few months back i was at a clinic in one of the north central states and a woman had put to bed but the baby was born with a  twisted arm and bent ears. While the doctor was trying to straighten the arm and ears the mother stood by the side in tears at the sight of how much pain her baby was going through and i started to console her when the doctor said 'leave her she needs to cry'. Apparently she had warned the couple about complications if the baby was pushed out through the vagina and advised that a CS be carried out, but the husband had refused saying he wouldn't want his wife to have scars. what a reason!
what kind of man will put both the lives of his wife and child at risk for a reason so trivial and petty? and what kind of woman will let a man (husband or not) put her baby's life at risk.
These cases are everywhere, cheating spouses who won't use condoms, husbands who won't
let their wives access family planning services etc.
The reason why women still go through such is 'because we do not know we are entitled to sexual and reproductive health care services and that is to be blamed on our parents (yes! i said so) and the African society where women are brought up to be 110% subservient to the men. A society where a  couple married for 4 years have no child and everyone assumes it's the woman's fault, family members bring a new wife for the husband. Why isn't a new husband found for the wife instead?? (if blame must be assigned)..
The reason behind this long epistle is this.. women!! you have a right to protect yourself. if you don't no one else can. That is why you hear men say 'why did she let herself get pregnant'.. and guess what? they are right! its your life, take charge of it